Do not treat your wives like slaves:
بسم الله والحمد لله
والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله ، وبعد
There are men who, out of no reason, annoy their wives, treat
them like captives, do not fulfill their rights, yet they want the wives to be
submissive and obedient and expect the marriage to be successful.
In the Hadeeth of `Abdullaah bin Zam`ah رضي الله عنه he mentioned: Then (in
the sermon) the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم made mention of women and said: “There is amongst you who beats (flogs) his wife as if she
was a slave, and then he sleeps with her at the end of the day.” [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (4942) and Saheeh Muslim (6837)]
Shaikh Ibn `al-`Uthaymeen رحمه الله said:
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم gave a sermon and `Abdullaah ibn Zam`ah
was among those who heard it. Among the things which the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم mentioned was:
“There is amongst you who flogs
(beats) his wife as if she was a slave, and then he sleeps with her at the end
of the day.”
Meaning: he flogs (or beats) her as if there is no relationship
between the two of them and as if she is a subjugated captive (and who is there
only to fulfill his desires). This is not an appropriate behavior because the
relationship between the man with his wife is a special bond which should be
based upon love, affinity and away from immorality – either of statements or actions.
But as for his flogging her like a slave and then at the
end of the day he wants to sleep with her – how can he sleep with her at the
end of the day and enjoy her and fulfill his desires while he has beaten her
like a slave?! This is an inharmonious behavior. That is why the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم admonished against
such behavior, for such things should not be part of a man’s attitude (towards
his wife). And the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم
spoke the truth, for such behavior does not befit a sane person let alone a
Believer.
[Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen (3/118-119)]
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