Never Take Things For Granted!

 بسم الله والحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله ، وبعد 

🌟 QUOTE:

❝They say:
“You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.”
But the truth is:
“You knew exactly what you had. You just didn’t think you’d lose it…”❞

 

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🌟 The Pain Of Moving On After Getting Used To A Comfortable Life/Place/Situation:

The comforts in life come in different shapes and sizes. People love having luxurious homes, comfortable cars, lots of wealth, beautiful wives and children, big farms, etc. As Allaah تعالى mentioned:

زُيِّنَ لِلنَّاسِ حُبُّ الشَّهَوَاتِ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ وَالْبَنِينَ وَالْقَنَاطِيرِ الْمُقَنطَرَةِ مِنَ الذَّهَبِ وَالْفِضَّةِ وَالْخَيْلِ الْمُسَوَّمَةِ وَالْأَنْعَامِ وَالْحَرْثِ ۗ ذَٰلِكَ مَتَاعُ الْحَيَاةِ الدُّنْيَا ۖ وَاللَّهُ عِندَهُ حُسْنُ الْمَآبِ

{Beautified for men is the love of things they covet; women, children, much of gold and silver (wealth), branded beautiful horses, cattle, and well-tilled land. This is the pleasure of the present world's life; but Allaah has the excellent return (Paradise with flowing rivers, etc.) with Him.} [1]

But the thing is that not only did our hearts get attached to the comforts of this life, rather, we also got comfortable with sins. And every sin, if not repented, comes with a price, and now we are paying the price... loss of lives, health, jobs, and wealth, the ever-increasing expenses, the insecurity about what the future holds, the uncertainty of the next move, and the indecisiveness about the next step.

In this life, the trials are of many types. Sometimes, Allaah تعالى tests someone by giving it to them, at other times He تعالى tests them by withholding it from them, and for some others, He تعالى tests them by taking it away from them.

There is the pain of not having something, and then there is the pain of losing something. One of the hardest tests are those that come after the hearts are attached to someone or something. There are some situations mentioned in the Qur’aan that one cannot truly understand or feel the full effect until they are put into a similar situation.

The story of Ibraaheem عليه السلام having the Imaan to sacrifice Ismaa`eel عليه السلام will have more of an effect on a person after he has a child than before he had a child.

Similarly, the anxiety of the mother of Moosaa عليه السلام for the safety of her son can be felt more after having our own child facing some imminent danger.

A lot of people realize the sacrifices that their parents made for them only after reaching the age of forty (40) years and after having children of their own. As Allaah تعالى said: 

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا ۖ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ كُرْهًا وَوَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهًا ۖ وَحَمْلُهُ وَفِصَالُهُ ثَلَاثُونَ شَهْرًا ۚ حَتَّىٰ إِذَا بَلَغَ أَشُدَّهُ وَبَلَغَ أَرْبَعِينَ سَنَةً قَالَ رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَعَلَىٰ وَالِدَيَّ وَأَنْ أَعْمَلَ صَالِحًا تَرْضَاهُ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي ۖ إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَإِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ

{And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother carries him with hardship and she brings him forth with hardship, and the bearing of him, and the weaning of him is thirty months, till when he attains full strength and reaches (the age of) forty years, he says: “My Lord! Grant me the power and ability that I may be grateful for Your Favor which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents, and that I may do righteous good deeds, such as please You, and make my off-spring righteous and good. Truly, I have turned to You in repentance, and truly, I am one of the Muslims (submitting to Your Will).”} [2]

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 🌟 The More The Love, The Greater The Test:

Concerning the saying of Allaah تبارك وتعالى:

أفرءيتم ما تحرثون * ءأنتم تزرعونه أم نحن الزارعون * لو نشاء لجعلناه حطاماً فظلتم تفكهون

{Then tell Me about the seed that you sow in the ground. Is it you that makes it grow, or are We the Grower? If We Willed, We could crumble it to dry pieces, and you would be regretful (or left in wonderment)} [3]

🎓Shaikh al-`Uthaymeen رحمه الله said:
❝Observe how Allaah تعالى said: {If We Willed, We could crumble it to dry pieces}, and He تعالى did not say: “If We Willed, We would not have let it grow”, because when it grows and the people see it, their hearts become attached towards it (and the hope grows to eat from its fruit). So, if He تعالى makes it to dry pieces after their hearts are attached to it, it would hurt them more. And that is why He تعالى said: {If We Willed, We could crumble it to dry pieces}, and He تعالى did not say: “If We Willed, We would not have let it grow”.❞ [4]

And Allaah تعالى described this more beautifully and eloquently when He تعالى said:

أَيَوَدُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن تَكُونَ لَهُ جَنَّةٌ مِّن نَّخِيلٍ وَأَعْنَابٍ تَجْرِي مِن تَحْتِهَا الْأَنْهَارُ لَهُ فِيهَا مِن كُلِّ الثَّمَرَاتِ وَأَصَابَهُ الْكِبَرُ وَلَهُ ذُرِّيَّةٌ ضُعَفَاءُ فَأَصَابَهَا إِعْصَارٌ فِيهِ نَارٌ فَاحْتَرَقَتْ ۗ كَذَٰلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمُ الْآيَاتِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَفَكَّرُونَ

{Would any of you wish to have a garden with date palms and vines, with rivers flowing underneath, and all kinds of fruits for him therein, while he is stricken with old age, and his children are weak (not able to look after themselves), then it (the garden) is struck with a fiery whirlwind containing a fire so that it is burnt? Thus does Allaah make clear His Aayaat (proofs, evidence, verses) to you that you may give thought} [5]

Meaning: “Does anyone of you wish to have a garden with date palms and vines, with rivers of fresh water flowing underneath its trees, and there are all kinds of fruits for him therein, but he has become old and cannot cultivate his farm any longer, and he has small children and no one to look after them. While he is in this weak state, his garden is struck with a fiery whirlwind containing fire and it burns everything therein. This is the description of the condition of those who are not sincere (in their intentions and) in what they spend. They will come on the Day of Judgment (empty-handed), without any good deeds (nor will they be rewarded). And Allaah mentions the likes of these similitudes for our benefit so that we become sincere (in our intentions).” [6]

It is the sudden loss that has the worst psychological effect. Losing the house due to an earthquake or fire, or the car or the child in an accident. Such sudden, unexpected incidents have the most devastating effects. No one is prepared for that. Rather, nothing can prepare someone for that except the remembrance of Allaah! 

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🌟 The Three Important Adhkaar That Provide Comfort To The Hearts:

We need to remember, this life is not ours; the children, the wealth, the luxuries, nothing is ours. Even our stay on this earth is not permanent. We are like travelers and nomads, passing through this earth, and these luxuries have been provided as a temporary means to assist us in this journey. We know we are going to die and lose everything, yet we are not prepared for that eventuality when it affects us.

So, when things get tough, just try to remember these Aayaat and Adhkaar to help you get through this phase in your life:

#1 The saying of Allaah تعالى:

الَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ

{Who, when disaster strikes them, say: “Indeed we belong to Allaah, and indeed to Him we will return”} [7]

#2 The statement of the Prophet ﷺ:

إن لله ما أخذ وله ما أعطى وكل شيء عنده بأجل مسمى فلتصبر ولتحتسب

❝Whatever Allaah takes is for Him and whatever He gives, is for Him, and everything with Him has a limited fixed term (in this world), so be patient and hope for Allaah’s reward❞ [8]

#3 Another statement of the Prophet ﷺ: 

اللَّهُمَّ لاَ مَانِعَ لِمَا أَعْطَيْتَ، وَلاَ مُعْطِيَ لِمَا مَنَعْتَ، وَلاَ يَنْفَعُ ذَا الْجَدِّ مِنْكَ الْجَدُّ

❝O Allaah! No one can withhold what You give, and none can give what You withhold, and the riches of a fortunate person will be of no avail to him against You, for from You comes all wealth and fortune.❞ [9]

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📑 References:

1️⃣ [Surah aal-`Imraan (3): 14]

2️⃣ [Surah al-Ahqaaf (46): 15]

3️⃣ [Surah al-Waaqi`ah (56): 63-65]

4️⃣ [Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen, (2/126)]

5️⃣ [Surah al-Baqarah (2):266]

6️⃣ Tafseer Muyassar. It is also reported in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree:
`Ubaid Ibn `Umair narrated: Once `Umar (Ibn Al-Khattaab رضي الله عنه) said to the companions of the Prophet ﷺ: “What do you think about this Aayah: {Does any of you wish that he should have a garden...?}” They replied: “Allaah knows best.” `Umar رضي الله عنه became angry and said: “Either say that you know or say that you do not know!” On that Ibn `Abbaas رضي الله عنهما said: “O chief of the Believers! I have something in my mind to say about it.” `Umar رضي الله عنه said: “O son of my brother! Say, and do not underestimate yourself.” Ibn `Abbaas said: “This Aayah has been set up as an example for (a person’s) deeds.” `Umar رضي الله عنه said: "What kind of deeds?” Ibn `Abbaas said: “For deeds.” Then `Umar (explained) saying: “This is an example of a rich man who does goods out of obedience to Allaah and then Allaah sends Shaitaan to him whereupon he commits sins till all his good deeds are lost.” [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (4538)]

7️⃣ [Surah al-Baqarah (2): 156]

8️⃣ Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (1284, 5655, 6602, 6655, 7377, 7448) and Saheeh Muslim (1537). The complete Hadeeth is as follows:

Usaamah bin Zaid رضي الله عنه narrated: The daughter of the Prophet ﷺ sent (a messenger) to the Prophet requesting him to come as her child was dying (or was gasping), but the Prophet ﷺ returned the messenger and told him to convey his greeting to her and say: ❝Whatever Allaah takes is for Him and whatever He gives, is for Him, and everything with Him has a limited fixed term (in this world) and so she should be patient and hope for Allaah’s reward.❞ She again sent for him, swearing that he should come. The Prophet ﷺ got up, and so did Sa`d Ibn `Ubaadah, Mu`aadh Ibn Jabal, Ubai Ibn Ka`b, Zaid Ibn Thaabit, and some other men. The child was brought to Allaah’s Messenger ﷺ while his breath was disturbed in his chest as if it was a leather water-skin. On that, the eyes of the Prophet ﷺ started shedding tears. Sa`d said: “O Allaah’s Messenger! What is this?” He ﷺ replied: ❝It is mercy which Allaah has lodged in the hearts of His slaves, and Allaah is merciful only to those of His slaves who are merciful (to others).❞

9️⃣ [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (844, 6330, 6615, 7292) and Saheeh Muslim]